She Keeps Me Warm
by aberm
Summary: Love is love is love is love. AU Columbia and Magenta. One shot.


**A/N:** So, the lack of Columbia and Magenta centered fics is more than a little alarming. I know that Riffgenta is the boss of all RHPS ships, but that doesn't mean there shouldn't be any more room for the others.

These two are everything and I'm so glad they got to interact positively in the film _at all._ It is safe to say that they must've cared for each other at least a little bit, despite Magenta virtually not giving a shit when Riff shoots Columbia with the anti matter gun. In this story, it's all about Mags and Collie. Love them, and I love Pat and Nell just as much, too. Queens. Anyways, on with it! This is trash, by the way! (Also! Characters may be out of character because, well, I'm horrible. Okay bye.)

TW: For some homophobic slurs. Also, italics are my _close_ friends.

Rating: T or M. Mostly M. Maybe just T, though.

...

 _Earth, Fall 1972._

Earth so far is...interesting.

Magenta can't describe it any other way. They landed just a few short weeks ago, conveniently in the middle of a quiet forest in the outskirts of a town they later learned to be called _Denton_.

Denton: a small, sleepy town buried somewhere in the growing, ever-so-popular country-America.

Riff Raff made sure to do his homework prior to making haste of this mission, and after the successful settlement. Being mostly the brains of the operation, he wanted to know exactly where they are and how safe it is.

( _"We're all clear Frank-N-Furter, this is just a boring, tiny spec on the planet Earth and won't be a threat if we reside here for the rest of our stay."_

 _"Excellent, Riff Raff, excellent. Now kindly fuck off for some moment, I am in the middle of one of my erotic stories."_ )

The trio made various trips into town, gathering any and all necessities that were not brought with them from their native home of Transsexual. Checking out the scene and familiarizing themselves with the town was also part of the plan. Luckily, Riff Raff and Frank were able to fix up the broken down truck that sat parked and abandoned near the castle. A lot of conveniences, so they thank the stars, and don't question it.

Automobiles are driven on the ground here. It's strange to Magenta, because she's so use to seeing a driving machinery that never really _touches_ the ground. Everything worked off-ground because of common practicality. They live on a planet of little seclusion; they are able to travel from planet to planet in their galaxy fairly easily-not accessible to everyone, but accessible nonetheless. On here, the farthest they've seemed to reach is their inadequate moon. It makes Magenta chuckle with second hand embarrassment. At least these beings have enough common sense to have airplanes and such that actually fly beyond their gravity. How have they been getting by with this shit for _years_?

It's amazing to see how these humans live so similarly to them. According to Riff, Transsexual isn't as ancient as the rock planet Earth, but it's culture and society is way ahead of its own. Sex is far more celebrated there, than it is here. Watching what they call a "television", they don't even mention the words _sex_ or _fucking_ at all. Like, it's some sort of strictly taboo topic. It's absolutely baffling to the redhead. How can these earthlings take something that is so natural and lovely and _needed_ , and turn it into something of an unspoken folklore? Something off limits? Other than that none sense, everything else either feels homely or completely foreign, yet fascinating.

What's not fascinating is Frank's ordinary hunger cycle for sex. He's inevitably already grown bored with the siblings, so he is now on the hunt for some new willing playmates. Magenta has no qualms with the matter. She never really did particularly _enjoy_ her sessions with him, so she felt way more than a little relief to hear his announcement that he will be spending more time outside of the castle in search for potential earthling lovers. Go, Frank!

Riff Raff felt the same way, and so to celebrate that, the two had their own series of sex-capades.

Incest isn't outlawed on Transsexual, but it isn't really the norm either. People don't question it. It just happens. Brothers with sisters, sisters with sisters, brothers with brothers, even cousins with cousins. Riff Raff and Magenta never made this a habit back home. They might've done it once or twice, for experimental purposes, but now since they're here, on a completely different planet in a completely different Galaxy, and virtually the only other familiar being with them is Frank, it's easily become a normal occurrence. Nothing to see here, really. But there are no romantic feelings involved. Magenta hasn't been _in love_ with another person since her days of educational schooling. The dick ended up breaking her heart, so she broke his leg. Simple mistake, she told the school and his parents. With big doe green eyes and a small frame, she looked innocent enough, so they left it at that.

Riff still laughs at it to this day. ( _"Innocent, my ass."_ )

The only down side to this fresh routine of Frank's, is that since he's bringing in all of these strangers, he's demanded that they actually play their _parts_ and refer to him only as _master_. With playing their parts, come new uniforms for Magenta and Riff Raff.

Magenta: _a domestic_. Given a black, button up dress, tailored with white cuffs and lapels. Accompanied with the dress is a white small headpiece and a white apron that she must fasten around her waist. It's a boring outfit, but at least it goes well with her fishnets and heels.

Riff Raff: _a handyman_. Given a white button up shirt, a black tail suit jacket, tight black slacks, and black fingerless gloves. The joke's on Frank, because Riff rather likes his fingerless gloves. Makes him look good.

They have to wear it all of the time now. The duo has learned to live with it; and with their insufferable _master_.

Earth is interesting-but it's about to get even more interesting.

...

 _Earth, Summer 1973._

Frank is restless today.

Riff Raff is busying himself with technical matters in the pink laboratory, so the transvestite has gone in search of his trusty domestic. He found her lazily running a feather duster over a barely touched mantle near the entrance, her mind-obviously-on other matters.

"Magenta," Frank says, almost startling the woman. His voice almost shakes the chandelier; another object she should probably dust, but most likely won't.

"Get the truck. We're going into town."

Magenta watched him descend the staircase in his spiked heels. Drown in his usual attire that mainly consists of a black sexy corset, black skimpy panties, fishnets and his signature makeup, Magenta can't dismiss the fact that Frank looks hot. He always does.

Frank prides himself on setting certain...boundaries. He is in charge, he calls the shots, he looks the best. Pretty much why he's brought it upon himself to be referred to as master; a word used loosely on Transsexual, but holds severely negative connotations here on earth. It's never a surprise when Frank ignores the earthly association of the term, and insists on it anyways.

"Getting more supplies, master?" She asked, rummaging a drawer for the car keys.

"No. I need a new mate. Someone young this time...maybe female."

The domestic nodded and opened the front doors to lead Frank out to the dirt paved driveway where the truck sat parked. It's a nice warm day out; sun's out and all. Not a cloud in sight. Magenta didn't like it.

This is what Earth calls _summer_ and she despises it. It's too hot, too humid. This is torture for someone with wild, unruly hair. Magenta misses her moon drenched planet; wishing they can go back. The cool temperatures, no matter what time of the day or year it was, lingers in her mind. But, Frank's mission isn't over yet. It has barely even begun and they've been here for almost a year.

 _How is someone suppose to create new life when he's to busy fucking every earthling he comes across?_

People like to say Magenta was born with a scowl on her face. She sometimes believes that too.

That scowl is currently plastered on her face as she sits in the passenger seat of the old truck.

They've driven into downtown Denton plenty of times for it to be unexciting. The curiosity has lost its spark, and Magenta has permanent red palm marks on her cheeks from all of the times she has rested it on her hand out of boredom and weariness. They pass the same homes, and the same grocery stores, and the same parks. She even thinks they seem to be passing the same _people_. Do they ever get out of town much? Or welcome any newcomers? The Transylvanian's certainly never received a warm welcome, but they never really minded that. It draws less attention to them for the large part. That's appreciated.

Frank has been driving for a few moments until he slams on the breaks, almost sending Magenta's head to connect with the front dashboard.

"What the fuck?!" Magenta shrieks, forgetting for a moment how that was probably way out of line to say directly to Frank.

The scientist didn't pay any mind to that outburst, however, because he is way to busy checking out the tall petite girl tapping on a street corner.

Magenta followed his gaze to the girl, already knowing what this is about.

"That one?" She's practically a _child,_ Magenta thinks.

"She's practically a _child_." Magenta says. The domestic does have a habit of just saying the things she thinks. Most of the time it gets her into trouble, but she never really learns from those mistakes.

"Oh, now really, Magenta. What do you think I am? A predator? The girl's young, but she'll do quite nicely."

Before Magenta can even think of a reply, he's already gotten out of the truck. She looks around and rolls her eyes at the fact that Denton is so dead that no ones stopped behind them yet to honk their cars because Frank has literally left this machine idling in the middle of the street.

She can't hear what Frank says when he saunters up to the girl, but Magenta can guess. Probably something cheesy and seductive, along the lines of _"Oh, why hello there. The stunning, bright orb in the sky is simply paling in comparison to your striking beauty. I must know who you are. You are heightening my interest."_ Magenta laughs hoarsely to herself, amused with her impressive impression of her sultry master.

She notices the girl immediately blushing and smiling sweetly at the ground, obviously shy. The master has this affect on people. The domestic isn't surprised when the young girl accepts Frank's outstretched hand, and allows him to guide her back to the truck.

 _That was fast. Newest record._ Magenta makes a mental note to applaud the master later, probably when the girl leaves the castle with an unsteady walk and unkempt hair.

"Magenta. I'm sure you'll be okay with driving us back to the castle, yes?"

This isn't really a question because Frank isn't really asking, he's saying, and Magenta knows this, and Frank knows that she knows this.

Without rolling her eyes darkly, Magenta moves over to the drivers seat and waits for Frank and his new mate to become settled in the back.

And they're off.

Magenta occasionally glimpsed through the rear view mirror, trying to get a good look at the girl. She was definitely way too young. Or, at least she _looked_ way too young. Her mousy brown hair looks almost waist length, since she's got it in a neat and tight pony tail. She's so thin that Magenta actually worries if the girl eats at all. She needs a lot of protein, and other Earthly shit like that, right? She's wearing a colorful tank top and white shorts. Her long, creamy legs are holding the attention of both Frank _and_ Magenta. The latter is catching herself staring, so she forces herself to keep her gaze on the road. Frank makes small talk, and the two eventually learn that she's from Denton, she's a tap dancer, she's homeless, and her name's Columbia. It's an odd name that catches the Transsexual natives off guard, because the whole time they've been on this planet, they'd only heard of names such as Jane and Bob. Boring sounding names like that. But never Columbia. Isn't that a country somewhere around here? Interesting.

Before they know it, they're home.

Home. It's so weird for Magenta to think of this as home. But, here they are. She might as well roll with it.

"This is so neat! Big ole castle like this, and it's yours?!" Columbia squeals excitedly and runs ahead to the entrance.

They also learn she's really energetic and has the most annoying high-pitched voice either has ever heard in their own two separate lives.

...

 _Earth, Winter 1973._

A few months in and Magenta _still_ wants to rip out her hair every time that self-proclaimed _groupie_ so much as opens her mouth.

 _"Give the girl a chance, Magenta. She's cute."_ Frank told her, time and time again. But, it doesn't help. She still follows her around whenever she tries (and fails) to clean and still frustrates her to no end. She asks way too many questions, and always says the most childish things. She never cleans up after herself, she doesn't help around even when she trails behind and attempts to make conversation, she can't drive or cook or have anything useful to say, and _that damn tapping with those damn tapping shoes._

 _Fucking stars._

Magenta wants nothing more than to burn those damn shoes in a fireplace and dance around the flames, while Columbia sits weeping nearby. The thought of it almost makes the redhead smile sinisterly.

Not only is the domestic irritated with the groupie, but the groupie is also irritated with the domestic in return.

 _"Give my domestic a chance, baby. She's my servant, and somewhat of a family friend."_ Frank told _her_ , also time and time again. But the woman just won't _spend time_ with her. The second Columbia opens her mouth to speak, the domestic would roll her eyes and ignore whatever she has to say. It's rude and insulting. She doesn't allow Columbia to touch anything, and she's always glaring at her with those green penetrating eyes. It's slightly alarming. Sometimes Columbia has trouble going to sleep at night because of the stress Magenta puts her through. She doesn't talk to Columbia like a real person, always talking down on her. _And the smoking._

 _Christ. She gonna live past forty with that kind of habit?_

Columbia would like to take those packages of cigarettes and flush them down the toilet. She giggles at the mental image of it.

But alas, all things must come to an end. After fucking Columbia for the umpteenth time, Frank has decided he is once again bored. This leads to Frank kicking her out of his bedroom, which further leads to Magenta acquiring a new roommate.

Neither are happy with the new arrangement but the master wants to hear none of that.

"Now you two have a chance to become closer. Won't this be nice?"

And because Columbia is in love with Frank's dazzling smile, and because Magenta virtually has no say in the matter, the girls comply, and everything is settled.

There's a shouting match not long after they close their bedroom door for the night.

...

 _Earth, Spring 1974._

Magenta finds Columbia in a crumpled mess late one night. Her ugly crying is surprisingly unsettling for the domestic, causing a frown instead of a smirk. But then she remembers that Columbia sobs like this almost every other night, so what's new? After a little while, Columbia is still trying to catch her breath and her face is red as a cherry. It's never really gone on for this long before. So, because Magenta isn't a heartless robot, she slowly approaches the younger girl and cautiously sinks into the bed beside her.

"What's the trouble now, girl?" Her voice is firm, yet soft. She doesn't _want_ to make this worse, and that's strange for her. Magenta reaches a tentative hand to Columbia's slender shoulder, and luckily the girl doesn't flinch at the contact. It's almost like she doesn't even notice it. Now Magenta is slightly more worried.

Finally, Columbia sits up and Magenta can properly see the wetness on her face. You would guess Columbia had ran a marathon, with how much heavy breathing she's demonstrating.

"Frankie..." The groupie trails off as another sob escapes her. By now, the shorter woman is running her hand up and down the others back, attempting actual comfort instead of disturbing the girl. She encourages her to carry on.

"Well, you know! He's kicked me out of his room, he won't talk ta me like he used ta, he hardly even knows I exist anymore! It's like I'm nothin' ta him or somethin'. What's wrong with me? Why is he ignoring me?"

Columbia's red, tearful eyes are staring hard into Magenta's, frantically searching for an answer to this heartbreaking question, and Magenta wants to tell her that this is just how Frank _is_ and _always_ has been. He once threw her away too, and that it's normal for the scientist. There's nothing specifically _wrong_ with the groupie, it's just that he got bored. He always gets bored. He's a hyperactive, sexual being and he enjoys new and shiny toys he can play with and manipulate. It's depressing to watch this happen over and over with all of these humans, but that's just how it goes.

But Columbia keeps staring at her with those big eyes of hers, and she knows she can't give that explanation. By now, Columbia still has little to no idea of what they truly are; where they truly come from. And Magenta is just now deciding that that's not fair to the girl. She should know who she's sleeping with, because miraculously, she has made permanent room for herself in this castle. She has stayed a lot longer than any other earthling, and it looks like she won't be going anywhere anytime soon. She has slowly grown attached to these beings, and in return, the beings have slowly grown attached to her too. This revelation settles into the forefront of Magenta's mind, and she sort of shivers in result of it. She can't imagine her life over the past several months without this troubling pest, and she doesn't want to.

 _Well, shit, Magenta. You've got yourself an actual friend._

The older woman runs a hand over the girls long, silky hair, moving it down her cheek and caressing her jaw. Columbia is so still and silent that it should be music to Magenta's ears, but it doesn't faze her. She hardly even acknowledges the foreign stance in which the groupie is in.

When she speaks, her voice is low and gentle.

"Because Frank is an idiot, and he's missing out. Don't pay him and his petty antics any mind. You don't need him, anyways."

Columbia sniffles at the statement and ducks her head low. She keeps her eyes glued to the floor.

"But, I _do_ need him. I need _someone_..."

Magenta cuts her off by lifting the girls chin up to face her. Magenta's red painted lips curves into a small smile. (She always was aware that the woman was _supernaturally_ attractive, but never truly recognized her striking features) Columbia _properly_ realizes how _beautiful_ the older woman is.

"You've got me."

Eventually the two bury the hatchet. There are no more violent arguments or total avoidance. A bond is somewhat formed. Like, a nice sister-sister relationship. Columbia now helps around the castle and Magenta allows her. They've managed to have some of the most riveting conversations late at night, with no icy tones or venomous remarks. They go into town together and are seen to be in the middle of fluffy girl chat whenever they come back with arms filled with groceries or other various items. They even let each other give the other makeovers. Magenta has cut, styled, and dyed Columbia's hair, while Columbia has painted her nails, and applied suitable makeup for Magenta. They still bicker sometimes, but it's more half-hearted and over silly matters; like sisters.

Frank is loving this. Riff is surprised, but is delighted for this change in atmosphere as well.

Another change, is the new house guest that has been visiting every night for the past few weeks.

He first made an appearance when Columbia suggested pizza one night. Magenta shrugged at the request, and handed the phone over to Columbia who would happily place the order. Two large cheese pizza; plain and simple.

He arrived on a roaring motorcycle, startling the foreigners, and exciting the groupie. Apparently, she knew that sound all too well.

"Eddie!" She squealed when she opened the door and pulled a plump young man into the castle.

The instant cheeriness of the girl doesn't necessarily aggravate Magenta like it used to. Instead, a feeling of dread washes over her at the sight of Columbia suddenly giving all of her happy attention to this stranger. This feeling grows once Frank appears at the top of the steps, announcing his presence.

"How do you do? Columbia, who's our lovely guest?"

Columbia's wide grin shrinks into a frown as Frank descended the stairs, holding his intense gaze with the pizza delivery boy.

"Frankie, this is Eddie. We ordered pizza tonight. I hope ya don't mind."

"Mind? Why would I mind? A nice looking boy has dropped by on our doorstep and you wonder if I mind." Frank laughs at Columbia's expense and practically rips Eddie out of her grasp.

"Come, I must escort you around my grand keep." And off Eddie goes reluctantly with Frank's tight grip on his flabby arm.

Columbia watches helplessly, and Magenta wants nothing more than to strike Frank with this vacuum cleaner she's got sitting by her feet.

When the two men disappear into another room, Columbia goes rushing into the kitchen with fresh tears brimming her eyes. Magenta sighs heavily and follows her.

"Oh, Mags, he's gonna do it again! He's gonna use Eddie!" The taller girl plops herself down onto the small table and begins her water works.

Magenta doesn't hesitate to go near her and kneel by her side. She tries to shush the girls sobs, but it doesn't immediately work.

"Shh, shh. You know how Frank is, Columbia. Soon he'll grow tired of that boy and he'll be yours again." Finishing that sentence makes Magenta's skin crawl for some reason. _What of this feeling?_ She questions herself, but she hasn't any time for that now because Columbia is still weeping and doesn't look to be calming down anytime soon.

"But I met Eddie _first!_ Why can't Frankie just let me have this one?"

It breaks Magenta's heart to see this. To see Columbia so broken and vulnerable. Sure, she's seen Columbia cry countless times before, but when it gets to be like this, it doesn't leave a good feeling. Magenta doesn't really know what to say, so instead she wraps her arms around her, and guides Columbia's face closer so that she can bury it in her chest. They stay in that position for what feels like hours, until Riff finds them and helps his sister take Columbia back upstairs to their bedroom. The domestic mouths a thank you to the handyman and he vanishes back out into the hallway to leave them some privacy.

The room is silent until Columbia raises her head to look at Magenta.

"Magenta?" She squeaks, tears no longer trailing down her face.

"Hmm?" Magenta turns to look back at the girl, waiting expectantly for her to continue.

"Can I tell you a secret? Nothin' big, but somethin' I haven't been completely honest about."

Magenta's eyebrows knit together, slightly confused and slightly worried about this apparent secret Columbia is just now deciding to share with her.

"My name...isn't Columbia..." She trails off, turning her gaze onto something else in the room.

"What?"

"It's...Laura. My real name is Laura. I lied to you and Frankie that day."

Magenta is still somewhat confused. She doesn't really know how to respond so she stays quiet.

"Columbia is my stage name. I planned to use it when I got famous. But that doesn't look like it's gonna happen, so..." Her eyes cast back to the domestic's, waiting in bated breath to see her final reaction. _She'd probably be mad that ya lied to her, idiot!_

Magenta isn't saying anything and it's worrying the groupie.

"Magenta? Say something!"

But then she just laughs. Not a loud one, but a chuckle escapes her. Now it's Columbia's turn to furrow her brows.

"What's so funny? Huh, Magenta? What's funny?! My name? Are ya laughing at my stupid, tasteless name?!"

"No, Columbia, no!" Magenta is quick to reassure her friend that that's not the case at all. Sure, a name like Laura isn't special, but it doesn't matter to Magenta, because she will always be Columbia in her eyes.

"I don't care if your real name's _Laura_. You'll always be Columbia to me."

Columbia smiles wide in utter relief and envelops her shorter friend into a fierce hug, and Magenta finally has found the right moment to truly say what she thought.

"So, ya got any secrets for me?" Columbia giggles when she separates herself from the redhead.

Magenta's beam reduces to a frown, and this unsettles the other.

 _I think it's time..._

The Transylvanian's have never really discussed the matter if they should tell Columbia the truth or not. It's always been an unspoken agreement to keep her in the dark. Months ago, Magenta wouldn't dare or even _care_ to let Columbia know the truth. But now, at this very moment, her mind is screaming for it.

"Collie..." It's the first time Magenta has ever used a shorten version of her name and it surprises them both.

"Yes?" She waits for her to continue, anticipating this sudden reveal. She wonders briefly what it could be.

 _I've been using a fake name, too._

 _I'm in love with someone._

 _I've killed before._

 _There's a dead body in the cellar, and that's why you're never allowed down there._

"We're not from here..."

Columbia thinks for a moment, and then rolls her eyes.

"Well, I figured that much! You've all got accents and shit."

It starts to feel all anticlimactic until Magenta shakes her head.

"No, Columbia. It's not what you think. You're thinking we're from another country."

"What? You saying you're from another planet or somethin'?" Columbia begins to laugh uncontrollably. She bangs her hands on the bed and mockingly wipes away imaginary tears. That famous scowl of Magenta returns, and it's better than ever.

"Columbia." She says in a serious tone.

The taller girl stops laughing and looks at Magenta with a crease etched into her brows.

"Are you being serious?"

Magenta nods.

"What is this? Some sort of trick you wanna play on me? First Frank takes Eddie away from me, and now you wanna carry out some dumb scheme of yours? Well, no siree bob, you're not gonna pull the wool over my eyes!"

Columbia stands and paces the room while she carries on with her rant, completely oblivious to Magenta scavenging the dresser for something. When she finds what she's looking for, she tries to catch the groupies attention again. The whole time she hasn't stopped talking, and _there's the annoying child_ that has always peeved the older woman.

Magenta has finally had enough of this.

"Columbia!"

Said girl halts any more action and goes silent.

"I'm not deceiving you. Look at this."

Magenta opens her palms to reveal a small, box shaped item. With a press to a button, a cast of light beams onto the ceiling and a clear image is projected, not on the ceiling, but in the air. Columbia can see an outline of a planet-but not their planet. Or any planet in this solar system, for that matter. For the first time in history, Columbia is utterly speechless. It takes a long moment for her brain to formulate a coherent sentence.

"Magenta...what is this?" She's whispering, afraid that if she speaks to loud, the image will evaporate, and no trace of this actually happening will be left.

"It's my home planet. It's Transsexual." Magenta smiles fondly at the displayed hologram, remembering how homesick she used to be, and now the feeling is suddenly returning full force.

"Transsexual? But...I thought you guys were from Transylvania?"

"Transylvania is our galaxy. It's merely a coincidence that you have an area here with the same name."

Columbia slowly walks around the hologram, reaching a hesitant hand out toward it.

"Go ahead, it won't hurt you." Magenta encourages, happy to see her friend curious and interested.

Columbia pokes at it, relieved that it didn't sting her or anything like she expected. It finally dawns on her that Magenta is telling the truth. She's surprised to find that she is not angry. Or scared.

The two smile at each other and Columbia spends the night with her head in Magenta's lap, while the redhead talks animatedly for hours about her planet and her life before landing on Earth.

Any lingering thoughts of Frank and Eddie are long forgotten.

...

 _Earth, Fall 1974._

Frank, at first, had not taken the news of Columbia knowing the truth very well. He had even made an attempt at her life, but Magenta was having _none of that_. She practically ripped their master to shreds, and Frank hadn't even _touched_ Columbia; only spoke the threat out loud.

Frank left them alone after that, and pretty much abandoned the idea of taking out Columbia and eventually shrugged the whole thing off. So, she knows, she knows. She's basically moved in. It doesn't matter anymore and the transvestite moves on to other subjects of interest-like his newest and latest earth toy.

Eddie still comes around, but not for Frank anymore.

Magenta has to bite her tongue whenever she answers the ringing of the door and Eddie is standing there, with his bikers jacket that he wears all the time and his bikers helmet resting on his side.

This time she manages to suppress a growl when Columbia comes bouncing down the stairs and lightly brushes past Magenta to roughly pull Eddie into a big sloppy kiss. She does give in to her signature eye roll.

Columbia wastes absolutely no time, and drags the chuckling Eddie up the stairs and down the hall. They go in a different direction than the girls shared bedroom because Columbia has half the decency to have sex with Eddie in a different room so that Magenta doesn't risk walking in on them. The domestic is touched by the thoughtfulness, but that's about all the positive feelings she gets out of this structured situation.

Riff Raff is leaning against the kitchen entrance door frame, having watched the scene before him. He smirks at Magenta, whom promptly turns and notices him there for the first time.

"Why the miserable face, sister?"

The redhead shakes her head and begins to walk out of the foyer. She doesn't know where she's going, but the dining room seems like a good place to be right now. Riff follows her and it makes her want to run into a wall, hoping she'll have the sudden ability to be able to run through it and disappear somewhere else; where no one can find her.

"Magenta." Riff calls in a singsong voice, enjoying this pre-teasing very much.

"Riff, you know that I'm always miserable. What of it now?"

"You like that girl." Was his only knowing reply. The smile accompanied with it makes that statement even worse.

"Who?" Magenta would hit herself if she were the one in Riff's position because this is the dumbest thing to say when the obvious answer is just _so fucking obvious_. But Riff just laughs at her.

"You know who. You _like_ her."

"Why would I _like_ that insufferable pest?" It actually hurts a little to say this, and she still doesn't get why.

"Because this is the first time I hear you using insults like 'insufferable pest' in months and I've never seen you so demented than when you opened that door to find Eddie."

Magenta's thoughts swim so wildly in her head, like if you put a dead fish into a tank filled with piranhas. Right now she's feeling like the dead fish. She tries to play this off anyways.

"Columbia has managed to not annoy me for some time and I only dislike that pizza boy because he looks at me strangely and always smells of cheese."

Magenta has a knack for coming up with decent lies, Riff has to admit. But he's been watching the two girls for some time now, and he is sticking by his conclusion. He won't let his little sister fuck this up, no matter how frustrating that earthling girl _can_ be.

Riff Raff gives her a look. Not just any look, but his smug look that always drives Magenta crazy because it means that he is right and he knows all and he is the elder brother and...

Because she finally slows down enough to let the realization settle in, she stops thinking all together. So Riff carries on with his perspective on this issue. In the end, Magenta had to be told by her older brother, that she is indeed more than interested with Columbia. It's the boy she injured back on Transsexual all over again, except that it's a human girl and she hasn't purposefully crapped on Magenta's heart. She immediately feels guilty about wanting to kill Eddie...

Columbia, in the meanwhile, has been stuck in the same exact rut. Sure, she knows about Riffs and Magenta's... _arrangement_ that they've made for themselves when they landed in Denton, not minding that they are siblings (it actually took a while to warm up to that revelation, but Columbia was able to expand her mind to newer possibilities when it comes to sex and romance). But just because she knows and understands, doesn't mean she doesn't _care_ about it. It drives her nuts to see Riff and Magenta sometimes slip away together and disappear behind the handyman's bedroom door. It sickens her whenever she walks into a room and she sees Frank dangerously near Magenta, no doubt flirting with her by whispering sweet and dirty things in her ear. It tears her apart to be around Magenta and laugh and talk but not be able to really actually _feel_ her in any other way besides some friendly and platonic touches here or there.

Columbia never really pieced all of these things together; not until she was lightly pinned under Eddie's weight, his lips devouring her neck, and she imagines that those lips belong to a certain redheaded domestic, and not to this delivery boy whom she's fallen in love with, and who's here and _now_.

She _has_ fallen in love with Eddie...right?

That being a question alone makes everything click into place and Columbia suddenly can't breathe under Eddie, so she nudges him off. And he lets her because he's no animal; he's Eddie Scott and he's just about the nicest boy she's ever been with. It's a shame really. So many people look down on him, just because he's not one to follow the norms in this society, but he doesn't care. It breaks her heart that she'd have to break his.

"What's the trouble, Collie?"

Eddie has been calling her that and it used to make her smile, but now it makes her cringe because it doesn't sound right coming from him anymore. Magenta says it better. Columbia doesn't mention that him. Instead, she gets up from the bed, murmurs an apology to Eddie, and dashes out of the bedroom. She doesn't know where she's going exactly, but she's grateful to see that her legs have carried her to the dining room because there's Magenta. And Riff Raff.

And Frank.

"Ah, yes, Columbia! I'm so glad you've come to join us. Come, sit down, I have an announcement."

...

 _Earth, Winter 1974._

The church needs desperate repairs. Riff and Frank get to work, while Magenta quietly watches from afar near the truck. Columbia opted to stay behind in the castle because she absolutely _hates_ the cold weather, even though this has been her brilliant idea.

Weeks after Frank's announcement that he's _finally_ going to be creating human life, they found this abandoned, broken-down house of some sort, curtesy of Columbia, who told them all about this church and how she used to go here when she was still living with her mother and father. The locals built a newer one much closer to the town, so they stopped coming to this one. It's spooky and dreadful looking now, but Magenta is sure it once looked lovely-and can look lovely again, with the help of the Transylvanian's.

At first, the gang was at a complete loss of how to go about making life. Riff indicated that they needed a host-or a body-because making one from scratch would be too much work and a waste of time. Frank was the first to suggest kidnapping an earthling and doing one over on them.

" _No_. We're not killing a human. That's not what we came here to do."

The transvestite rolled his eyes at the icy tone in Magenta's voice, still cross with him about his earlier threat to Columbia.

"Still in a mood, I see." He muttered under his breath, well aware that the whole room heard him anyways, but went on to ignore his comment.

While Frank sat with his arms crossed and his eyes stuck to the ceiling, Riff and Magenta went back and forward on how to go about this mission. Columbia watched the siblings, and suddenly thought of something useful.

"We could use a body that's already been dead, couldn't we?" Her voice was uncharacteristically small, but the trio heard her all the same. Magenta nodded with a broad smile.

"Yes, yes! Why couldn't we?" She turned to see Riff's stoic face.

"How are we to acquire a dead body?"

Magenta stopped nodding, looking to Columbia, whom shrugged her bare shoulders. The domestic sat near Frank in a defeated way, exhaling a massive sigh. The room was silent, until a tiny gasp was sounded. All three heads turned to the source of it.

"I know! Do what my uncle does, and become morticians!"

Columbia's smiled looked as if she solved the world's most puzzling mystery that absolutely no one else could have cracked. But when the Transsexual natives looked on to her with great confused faces, she remembers that they are literal aliens and must have no idea what she's saying. So, Columbia takes responsibility and informs the three about Earths many different religions. This includes theories about life and death, heaven and hell, God and the Devil, etc. All and all, the three were already somewhat familiar with religion, but now they knew way more than before.

It was eventually decided that they would create some phony church and pose as follows-

Frank, the minister. He would preach and head all of the religious ceremonies, including weddings and funerals. A perfect job for the prince because he's a natural born speaker and performer, so no one would notice if he got anything wrong. Frank had the talent and made people feel comfortable.

Riff and Magenta, husband and wife. They would assist the minister in anything he must do, and of course, keep the place looking spiffy.

And Columbia, the spinster. The groupie had immediately despised this title, but went along with it anyways because it's only a part, and " _the way you stepped out on Eddie, you should be so lucky if anyone would want to be with you."_

(Magenta nearly smacked Frank for making Columbia cry again.)

With a few more details, the plan was settled. Find a suitable corpse whenever it comes across their church, since they will double as a funeral parlor; steal it; and celebrate their step closer to victory. Frank was undoubtedly beaming, much thanks to Columbia, but not like he had the actual decency to acknowledge her efforts. Instead, he asked her to further explain this whole concept of weddings. Because Columbia is barely into her twenties, and still so _child like_ , her gloomy expression turned into that of excitement. Another note Magenta mentally takes down: Columbia is rather adorable when she rambles on about something she's passionate about.

Riff Raff took his leave, not at all interested in this earthling custom, but his sister remained, her green eyes glued to her friends. The handyman noticed, of course, and smiled his knowing smile before exiting the dining room.

Columbia could go on and on about this stuff; weddings and all. That's the only thing she likes about her way of life, really. Weddings are just so lovely and romantic. Everyone there to watch you walk down a decorated isle, with your father on your arm, and the person of your dreams waiting patiently at the end. The room is all dressed up, but you look the best with your white, soft, long gown, trailing beautifully behind you. A veil to cover your misty face because you're already almost crying, and you haven't even reached the minister yet. Columbia can picture it, so vividly clear. The sounds, the sights-hell, even the smell. She had always dreamed of the perfect wedding. She also dreamed of her perfect groom. But when she got to the end, this time, she noticed something particularly different. The opposite standing person was wearing no tux-but an elegant dress. Even their own veil couldn't hide the wild, untamed fiery hair.

Magenta.

Columbia had to snap herself out of the trance she was in. Frank was off in his own world, a dreamy look adorned on his caked up face. Magenta looked at her with concern in her eyes, obviously having noticed the unsettled look in her friends features. The groupie made an excuse for herself, hurrying out of the room, leaving behind a confused redhead.

Little did Columbia know, Magenta was having the same daydream whilst listening to her detailed explanation of marriage.

Now Magenta, still "supervising" the goons while they fix up the rundown church, continued thinking about her dilemma.

 _Weddings are just a silly thing earthlings made up. So why am I going over every minor detail of my make-believe marriage to that girl?_

Magenta couldn't truly answer herself, because answering herself truly meant acknowledging and admitting to her stupid feelings that she is in love with Columbia.

 _But this is crazy! Columbia is a human girl! She doesn't come from my home planet, and she certainly wouldn't fit in. Besides, she probably has never even_ thought _of a woman in that way before._

These gnawing thoughts kept on for hours, profusely gripping onto Magenta's mind and refusing to let go. Magenta didn't know what to do. It was like she was stuck in a corner. The only thing Magenta did know, however, was that she could not-absolutely not-tell Columbia about these feelings. She'd only scare the poor girl off, and it would all go to shit.

Yes, the domestic would rather keep the groupie around _and_ happy. Magenta could only roll her eyes at the thought because that's just who she is. She was probably born rolling her eyes along with that scowl, too.

"We've done all we could today. Prepare to come back with us tomorrow."

Frank appeared before Magenta without much warning, almost startling the redhead. Frank smirked at her surprise and walked away to jump into the truck with some supplies in tow. He left the rest for Riff Raff and Magenta to fetch and put away in the back of the truck.

The ride home was relatively silent, with some random interjections from Frank. Magenta was out of the truck before Riff can even finish parking.

"That sister of yours needs better social and _listening_ skills."

She heard Frank say when she was making her way back into the castle. She could almost see Riff Raff rolling his own eyes, a habit he obviously picked up from her. She slightly smiled at the thought because _finally_ something she's contributed to him.

Barging through the door was a dumb mistake, because while she was coming in, Eddie was going out, and that's exactly what was happening because Eddie is now on the floor from being smacked in the face by the wooden door.

"Shit, I'm sorry Eddie," Magenta mutters, but can't stay behind to help the delivery boy up because she's literally shaking and she feels as if her hearts going to burst any second because _why is he here?_ keeps swarming inside of her head and she needs to go someplace silent and secluded.

She can faintly hear Eddie drawl out a 'that's okay' and something else, but she doesn't care to find out what it was, so she continues to run up the stairs and down the hall. Magenta finds herself in a random guest room, somewhere on the opposite side of the castle from where Columbia might be, in their shared bedroom. _He was here he was here he was here_ is taking over her mind, and all of this deep breathing isn't helping shit at the moment. This is a fucked up terrible situation that the domestic has put herself into. _It isn't fair. Why should I be locking myself away and panicking, when Columbia can just continue to fuck around with that silly pizza boy?!_

Magenta is at a standstill. She curls up on the bed and lets the tears slip until she falls asleep.

Columbia is not at a standstill. She's pacing around in her room; contemplating her next step of action.

Recognize feelings for Magenta, check.

Completely let go of Eddie-but still salvage any kind of friendship-check.

Next step...to be determined.

The groupie halted in her place, and swiftly threw herself onto her cot, exhaling the biggest sigh she's most likely ever made in her life. What is she suppose to do? Tell Magenta about these feelings? The shorter woman would probably laugh right in her face. Columbia wants to laugh in her own face, but she can't because that's physically impossible. So she instead mentally laughs at herself. _Columbia, you are so dumb. What the fuck are you doing?_

Magenta is _literally_ a whole new worldly being. She comes from another planet, for Christ sakes. She would never want to be with some mere earthling. To her, earthlings are problematic, trash, and boring. She's sick of earth, and she'll get sick of Columbia again, and things will spiral downhill, and Columbia wouldn't be able to do anything about it except maybe watch Magenta leave back to her home. And she has to let her because it's what Magenta would want and she would do anything to keep her happy. These kind of intense feelings are absolutely terrifying for the girl. She's never felt this way for anyone before. Tears are forming, and tears are falling, and Columbia just keeps on laughing in spite of herself.

 _Magenta would never want me. I wouldn't want me. And for the love of God; she's a_ woman _. How could I fall this hard for a woman of all people? My parents would have a cow if they ever found out about this._

 _"My daughter, in love with a woman! She's turned her back on God, on the Bible! What a disgrace!"_

 _I can't love her. It's against what I believe...what my religion believes...what my parents believe...what some book believes..._

 _Yeah? And what of this book? Who gives it the right to make my choices for me?_

 _Never mind that-but why should I turn my back on my feelings? Certainly, God would still love me. If he is up there... Well shit, is there a God? Oh geez... But this is how I feel. Love is love._

 _Love is love._

 _Love is Magenta._

 _I'm in love with Magenta._

 _...Where is Magenta?_

Columbia suddenly sits up right. She looks at the time. She bolts out of the room, and slams right into Riff Raff. He grunts upon the collision.

"Riff! I'm so sorry!" Columbia immediately creates some distance between the two, rubbing her arm nervously, seemingly apologetic. Riff can see the tears in her eyes, so he softens his previous tense position.

"Is Magenta in there?" Riff nods toward the doorway from which Columbia frantically emerged from just a short moment ago.

"No, I haven't seen her since you guys left earlier." Columbia feels solemn, because she was going to ask Riff practically the same question about Magenta's whereabouts.

Riff falls silent. So does Columbia, so it's now pretty awkward. Columbia never did know what to make of Riff Raff. He was certainly most peculiar, but also mysterious in a good way. He still hardly spoke with her, but he's no enemy. Columbia wonders what it would be like to have Riff walk her down the isle since her father wouldn't dare to participate in any such (homosexual, disgraceful-the two are really interchangeable in the eyes of her parents) wedding. The thought makes the pink haired girl blush, so she sprints away, making sure Riff Raff didn't notice a thing. He did notice, anyways.

Columbia wanders the halls. Any other time, the fact that these halls seem endless and mysterious would intrigue her, but right now at this moment, it's the most annoying and frustrating thing in the world because she's trying to find this damn stubborn, cold, beautiful, dreamy woman. Guest room after guest room, she checks into each one, but so far it's no dice. Giving up seems more appealing with each step, but just like that, luck turns around in her favor. She opens the last door of the hall, and immediately spots her curly haired friend passed out on the bed. Before she can stop herself, she's already calling out her name.

"Magenta?"

The said-domestic stirs on the comforter, and then slowly rises up. She sleepily rubs her eyes and takes a second to remember where she is.

She sees Columbia.

Hell. She's in, what earthlings like to call a place of eternal suffering, Hell.

The groupie stands awkwardly by the door, looking everywhere else that wasn't the redhead.

"Columbia." Her voice is hoarse, most likely from being woken up from her very short nap. Columbia can't look away now because fuck, she looks beautiful.

Without breaking eye contact, Columbia slowly moves towards the bed, and perches herself on the end of it when she reaches it.

"H-how'd the church thing go?"

Magenta noted that the taller girls voice seemed hesitant, and strained. Like she will have a break down any second. Magenta will have none of that because tears-especially Columbia's tears-dissolves her carefully constructed hard exterior.

"Considering the boys did all of the work- very well."

Columbia nods her head, rather pathetic like. "Oh."

Silence.

More silence.

Even more silence.

Still, silence.

There's yelling in the distance; probably Frank.

Silence again.

It's so silent, that Columbia would love nothing more than to scream at the top of her lungs, just to fill this empty void that she feels they're trapped in.

"Columbia..." Magenta's voice is so soft, and the groupie immediately snaps her head to look at her.

"You're back with...Eddie...I presume..."

 _Huh? Eddie? Her tone sounds...sad?_

"Eddie? Mags, what'ya mean?"

"Eddie...I ran into him when he was leaving."

 _She must think he came here to play. Well, he did come to do just that, but I set him straight._

"Mags, no, no. He was here, yes, but not to be with me,"

The domestic furrows her brows and Columbia can't help but think how adorable she looks.

"I just had to tell him that we could still be friends and all...he did want to play dirty, but I stopped him...we're okay..." Columbia trails off lamely, suddenly finding her hands resting in her lap to be the most fascinating thing in this room.

 _Eddie and Columbia...just friends? This is spectacular news! Now, we can spend time together and-_

"Magenta,"

Magenta looks at her. Green eyes meets green eyes. They're simultaneously drowning in a sea of green; they much rather enjoy it and don't wish to be saved.

"I'd like to tell you somethin', and I'd like for you not to get mad or anything..."

Mad? How could she ever be mad at this girl? Last year, she was mad at her pretty much all day, every day. Today, that statement doesn't hold any truth or value.

 _I love you I love you I love you I love you_

"Please don't laugh at me either, even though I know that this will sound ridiculous to you."

Laugh? How could she ever laugh at this girl?

 _Love love love love love love love love_

"Mags...I really like you."

Columbia practically whispered it, but Magenta heard it like it was shouted at the top of the groupies lungs.

Like? Is that all? Well...she could always like this girl, of course...

Her heart is literally sinking so low in her chest, that she might expect it to slide out of her body. She wants it too. She forces a faltering smile anyways.

"Well, Collie, I like you, too. But why would I be mad or laugh at you for this?"

Columbia squeezes her eyes shut because _Magenta doesn't get it._ She tries again.

"No, Magenta. Not _like_ in a friendly sense of the word...fuck, do ya know what I mean?"

Magenta always had those moments where her brain worked extremely slow. She doesn't know if it's because she wasn't born with the highest IQ like Riff Raff, or because her parents never really worked with her mind, or because she's just too tired right now of all of these emotions and...oh. _Oh_.

The redhead looks to the pinkhead.

Columbia looks so hopeful, so precious, and is waiting with bated breath, Magenta honestly can not fucking take it anymore. It hurts to restrain herself, so she decides not to any longer.

She grabs the groupies face with her shaking hands and pulls her in so that her lips can crash onto hers.

Electric currents, and explosions, and stars, she sees so many stars, and like rays of light, lots of colorful light swirling around in her peripheral, the sounds of a symphony is maybe playing, but she's not paying so much attention to that because her own lips are locked with hers and they're dancing. Not in the literal sense, but metaphorically. They can probably start dancing at any second.

The kiss ends after an eternity. They're not sure who pulled away first, but they're damn sure neither wanted to.

"I don't just _like_ you in a friendly way, either." Magenta breathes, and Columbia barely breathes with her.

There are smiles for miles at the moment. They each think the others smiles can light up the _galaxy_.

Magenta and Columbia spend the night wrapped up in each others arms, talking about nothing and everything. Mostly everything, because that's what they are to each other.

...

 _Earth, Spring 1975._

The kitchen is peaceful. Riff Raff enjoys it while lounging in a chair, his hands folded on his flat stomach, and his eyes restfully closed.

So peaceful. The moment's shattered by howling laughter coming through the swinging door, along with the pitter patter of bare feet hitting the tile floor.

 _The girls are awake, finally._

Albeit Riff Raff's relaxation is long gone, he can't help but smile at the two.

"So, earthlings actually keep _pets_ in their homes? Come now, Collie, you're surely putting me on." The remark may seem sore, but Magenta is grinning from ear to ear because she is amused by the fun fact her girlfriend chose to disclose earlier before they made a stop into the kitchen.

"I'm not joking! Dogs, cats, birds, fishes, horses-"

"Horses? Aren't they massive? Too big to be living inside of a house, I'm sure."

"No no no, they don't live _inside_ of the house, well, they do live in _a_ house but not where the family sleeps and eat! They're on a ranch."

"Ranch? The...dressing?"

Columbia simply smiles at her. She snakes her arms around the slightly shorter woman and steals a quick kiss.

"Yes, the horses live on Ranch dressing."

Magenta giggles, and the sound still catches both the groupie and the handyman off guard.

Riff Raff can hardly remember a time when Magenta giggled at all. He can recount that years ago, when they both were barely old enough to cross their streets on their own, she might found any to all things giggle worthy. Columbia had no prior memories of a giggling Magenta, so hearing this sound all of the time now gives her an overwhelming flood of happiness.

"Ugh, you two give me head cramps."

All three heads turn to see Frank entering the kitchen and stumbling towards the refrigerator. His sunglasses hides his eyes, but everyone knows the wild night the transvestite indulged in with a few nightly guests. All but Magenta manage to hold off on rolling their own eyes.

"You mean head _aches_ , Frankie."

He scoffs while opening the refrigerator door. "I _mean_ you two should hold off on the whole sucking-on-each-other's-faces thing you've got going on."

"You sound ridiculous." It was Magenta's turn to chime in.

"I feel ridiculous." Frank replied honestly, grabbing a half eaten plate of sea food and a bottle of beer.

"You should; you drank so much last night, I'm surprised you're even up this early." The groupie pointed out, moving around the island countertop so she stood directly across from Magenta. She reached for the domestic's hand, and squeezed it softly when they intertwined their fingers.

"Never mind that. We must attend to the church today. Get dressed; all of you."

The couple traded annoyed glances and left the kitchen with their hands still locked and secured. Frank noticed and watched intently with a hard expression as they exited into the main hallway. He shook his head.

"Who fucking knew those two would be...that." He gestured vaguely toward the swinging door.

"I think it's rather sweet."

Frank slowly turns toward the handyman and raises a perfect eyebrow, his frown appearing to be set in stone. Riff Raff smirked at him, getting up to follow in pursuit after the girls. The doctor grunts at the sudden emptiness of the room, and shuffles out with the plate of sea food and a bottle of beer held tightly in his hands.

There's a funeral today. The corpse is of an old woman; not who Frank wanted to bring to life, so they intended to truly bury her out in the graveyard next to the church. Before anybody even made an appearance, Columbia took one quick look into the coffin and immediately teared up.

"Collie, I told you not to look at it..." Magenta went to comfort her distraught girlfriend, letting the others head rest carefully on her shoulders. "Shh, shh, now, we'll have none of that."

"It's just so sad...Magenta, she's such a lovely looking lady...I wonder what she did for a living? Did she have any kids?"

Magenta sat on the ground and held the groupie in her arms for a little while, listening to Columbia go on about the woman in the coffin and theorizing what her life must've been like.

Riff Raff found the girls as is and warned them to get into places before Frank turns up and yells at them.

Magenta turns to Columbia. "Are you going to be alright from now on?"

The taller girl sniffles a bit, then helps herself up off of the floor before offering a hand to the domestic. "Yeah, ya know me; I'd cry over a Coca Cola commercial."

They exchange grins and get back to "work", also known as doing whatever Frank wants them too.

The funeral is depressing. Magenta isn't surprised but is also surprised at the same time. On Transsexual, whenever somebody no longer holds life, they celebrate. And not in a disturbing, oh-thank-the-stars-the're-gone-now kind of way, but more of a let's-celebrate-their- _life_ way. Basically remembering all of the good times, and congratulating them for moving on. Apparently, here on earth, they do the opposite. Achingly mourn over the loss; completely allowing themselves to feel negative emotions and to grieve sufferingly.

That's another thing to add to Magenta's growing list of "Why Earth Sucks, and Transsexual is Way Better."

When it's over, Riff Raff gets to work on burying the body, and Frank gets to work on arranging the next _event_. There's a possibility of a wedding soon. The girls cross their fingers at the prospectiveness.

("Columbia, this is ridiculous," Magenta says. "Why should I cross my fingers in hope? How would that help anything?"

Columbia only rolls her eyes at the other and whines a bit. Magenta gives in a little to quickly for her own liking. In the end, it doesn't matter, and the girls get their eventful wedding.

Columbia wants to catch the bouquet but Frank doesn't let her. The whining doesn't work on him anymore.)

A few weeks later, Columbia and Magenta are sitting around in the study. Riff is in the lab working on something, and Frank is somewhere around the castle. It tickles Columbia how much she's changed since being here. She usually would track down Frank at this moment; he'd turn her away; she'd track down Magenta; they'd have a fight; dinner; bed.

Now, it's like, "Frank who?"

Magenta appreciates this change _very_ much.

In actuality, there are about five various seating areas in this room-three sofas, a canapé, and a recliner chair. The girls blissfully like to pretend there's only one, so they end up sharing the canapé in an intimate way.

Magenta's hand finds its way to Columbia's, and it gives the groupie an odd thought.

"I wonder, who invented hand holding?" She asks curiously, playing with the domestic's soft hand.

Magenta cracks an eye open, and smiles warily at the girl.

"Probably someone with cold hands and no pockets." The red head shrugs, sealing her eyes shut again.

"Hmm. Probably. That's a nice thought though, isn't? Just think about it; some person must've really loved someone else, and couldn't stand not being able to touch them, even if they were walking side by side, or sitting next to each other, or laying in the same bed..." Columbia trails off while a red blush tints her cheeks.

Magenta is wearing a rather attractive smirk, and Columbia can't help but allow her mouth to twitch into a smirk as well to match hers.

"Mm, that is a nice thought. You know what else is a nice thought?"

Magenta leans over and captures Columbia's lips with her own.

It's like the stars and planets are all aligning, casting a dazzling stream of light, and drape them in a soft illuminating haze, so many stars, and the taste of spring is so fresh, so evident in that moment, everything is perfect.

Magenta reluctantly pulls away, enjoying the look adoring her girlfriend.

" _That_ wasn't a thought. That was an action."

"It was a thought, but then it became an action. Nice, though, isn't?"

"Definitely nice."

"I love you."

Magenta says it easily with a glowing smile, almost like it's nothing, but it is certainly something.

Columbia stares at her with the roundest eyes Magenta's ever seen. To the domestic's horror, it looks as if she's slapped the girl. She would have shoot a million apologies, because they've never really said it _out loud_ before. Sure, it was always an unspoken feeling that they each understood, but the words never did truly live to see the day. Now, Magenta's heart is beating so fast, it just might combust in her chest and end up splattered all over the younger girls face, which is _not_ a nice thought at all. Columbia notices the rise in panic in Magenta's face, so she quickly reassures the older girl.

"Hey, no, it's fine! Please, don't worry about it. I know you love me." She smiles her sweet, soothing smile at her, and Magenta visibly relaxes.

The relief that washes over the domestic makes the groupie feel guilty about automatically going into shock mode, instead of loving mode. Why did she freeze up like that? Surely, she's heard "I love you's" before, and has certainly traded them back a few times in her life; but why the sudden change in this familiar rhythm?

Magenta brushes the loose curly strands out of her face and it finally clicks for Columbia.

She's never been in love with a woman before. All of her previous suitors have been men and men alike. Never has she ever even seem interested in a woman. Now, here she is, in the arms of one, sharing the same bed with one, touching one, kissing one, _loving_ one...

Love.

It's love; so simple, yet so fucking complicated.

So why can't she just say it back?

She obviously does. It's always been there. In the air around them, in the way she plays with the others fingers, in the way she hugs her from behind, in the way she sometimes washes her untamed hair, in the way she moans her name at night, in the way she _looks_ at her. It's so clearly there, they so clearly know it's there, and yet Magenta had to say it first, and now that leaves Columbia in an invisible tight spot. She doesn't expect Magenta to be angry with her-at least not right away. It doesn't stop her from wincing the second the shorter girl sighs heavily and let's her sparkling smile disappear.

"You know you don't have to say it..." She says to her. Columbia wants to believe her, but it's hard. "I just wanted to say it. So I said it. But, I _know_ how you feel, so...you don't have to say it."

The crack in her voice makes Columbia want to slice her own chest open, grab her beating heart, and hand it to Magenta, bloody and pounding and all, because they both deserve it. Columbia deserves to feel some pain for the moment, and Magenta deserves to have someone who would do absolutely _anything_ for her. Columbia is willing to do it. She wonders if Magenta can read her thoughts instead, because in her head she's screaming "I love you's" but it isn't loud enough because Magenta is shifting out of her embrace and _she's actually going to leave the fucking room._

Magenta doesn't leave the room and it's just Columbia jumping to conclusions again. Instead, the domestic just sits back down next to the groupie, a sad smile painted on her ivory face.

"You'll say it eventually; I know you will."

Columbia wants to kiss her. She does kiss her. The "I love you" is in the kiss, and she wonders if Magenta can feel it there, too.

They change topics once the kiss is broken. Of course, they discuss a 101 reasons why Magenta dislikes the planet earth.

"I used to think it was interesting. But now I see that it's blatantly backwards."

"I know what you're getting at, but c'mon Mags! You've only seen Denton and what's on TV; you have to go out there and have an adventure! Go to New York, or California. Or, or, England! I hear a lot of good things about England. I bet you'd fit in, too. Well, at least Frankie and Riff would, cause of the accents and all. You'd have to go to Germany, I think."

"I know that. I guess what I mean is the whole 'men are superior' thing, and 'black people? What are those?' thing, and 'men and women relationships ONLY' thing. That last one really pisses me off, by the way. I mean, they all do, but, you know."

Columbia nods because she does know. Here is earth, being all men-marry-women-and-women-marry-men, and here _they_ are, being all oops-we're-both-women-but-who-cares?-hint-hint: everyone.

It angers her how blind she was during her earlier years before the castle. She followed exactly what her parents taught her, which is what their parents taught them, and so forth. And it all comes down to God. Remember him? They guy in the sky who likes to decide who we should love, apparently. Columbia doesn't blame him. She blames the people. God loves all of his children, but his children are having a lot of trouble grasping that concept.

The girls would often have these discussions because now that they have crossed that line, it's important that they talk about why it's not wrong that they did. This is especially imperative to Magenta because she worries. She knows Columbia used to be like that; like a person who would use hatred to feel about those who sleep with their own gender. It saddens Magenta to think about that, but now, before her is a completely changed person. It's one of those notions that makes the older woman smile.

"It's so wrong...so fucking wrong, and it would be nearly _impossible_ to change their perspectives. Mags, they're so fucked up, we wouldn't even be able to walk down the street holding hands or else they'd damn us to Hell with their religious outbursts." Columbia just about sounds like she wants to cry at this moment, but Magenta can see she's fighting to hold it together. She grabs her hand to comfort, which works like a charm because Columbia looks at her and there's adoration in her eyes; so clear, so present.

"Listen," Magenta says in a assertive tone. It's somehow soft at the same time and it baffles Columbia because how does she do that? Look and slightly sound so menacing, yet there's a warm undertone that wraps the groupie in safety and protection. "I don't care what other people think, okay? I'm not here to please them or to follow them. After all of this time, I don't think I even _remember_ why I'm here," the younger woman chuckles a bit. "But I don't care about those other earthlings. Only you." _Only you only you only you only you only you_

Magenta can say it a million times, and it would still cause major butterflies and goosebumps. Her blood levels must be high, she guesses. Everything is happening, and nothing is happening at the same time while they sit there.

Silence engulfs the study, and it's suddenly broken by the sound of the door opening. It's Frank, and he strides right in like the entitled bastard he thinks and knows he is.

"Happy to see me?" He can tell he walked in on a pretty heavy conversation, but he doesn't really care. His needs above all others, of course.

He's met with two annoyed frowns. He ignores that and get's right to his point.

"There's hardly any supplies in the kitchen. Go into town and retrieve them."

Groceries. He means groceries. And when the two just blink at him, he takes it that they've understood and he scoffs while turning around and leaving the room, just as quickly as he came in.

It's quite remarkable how easily the girls slip back into their usual flirty banter. So easy, but the significant discussion is still engraved in the back of their minds, waiting to be brought back out at a later time. Now it's time for an actual adventure; an adventure into Denton. It's a sigh inducer once they realize how lame that actually sounds once said out loud.

They get the truck and go into town. It's sunny out, but Magenta doesn't mind it a bit.

Since Columbia can't drive for shit, Magenta takes the wheel, as usual. The downtown area is quite bustling today, they've noticed. Columbia points out that it's popular to be out on a warm spring day. Magenta sees the logic in that, and pulls into Denton's largest grocery store.

Making their way into the store they've gone into so many times before, Magenta instinctively reaches for the groupies hand. Columbia usually never has a problem with lacing their fingers together, but this time she manages to pull away to grab a shopping cart. It was totally done on purpose, but Magenta doesn't really notice. She instead digs into her bra easily, since the top few buttons of her dress are always undone, and fishes out a white piece of paper. The shopping list. Columbia smirks at the girl and continues on following after her.

It wasn't because she didn't _want_ to hold her hand. Columbia rather enjoys that very much. It's just that, they've never really been touchy in public, and since Columbia is naturally a worrier, she worries about what others might think, say, or do-naturally. It makes the groupie sick to her stomach, but she's protecting them. The world's not ready; and she makes a mental note to talk to Magenta about that later.

The cart is halfway filled with various foods and items by the time the girls make a stop in the liquor isle. Giggling, Columbia skips over to a row and tugs a large bottle of Vodka off of a shelf. She turns to Magenta with a mischievous grin. The elder nods her head approvingly, causing the other to squeal in delight and skip back over to place the bottle in the cart and drag Magenta into a sensual hug, completely forgetting about the whole "protecting them" thing, but she's too swept up in the moment, and no one else seems to be around, so why not?

They continue down the isle, and this time, Magenta's hand grabs onto Columbia's, and there's no shaking her off now. The domestic offers the girl a reassuring smile, and that is enough to melt all of the apprehension away.

That is, until a lithe, middle aged woman, with a baby on her hip and a toddler by her side, _scorns_ them.

Her face says it all: disgusted, sickened, repulsed, mortified, offended, etc.

The girls halted right in their place, hands still connected, but smiles now dissolving into scowls. (Mainly from Magenta; Columbia sported a more horrified expression.)

"God save you both. There are more of you springing up by the day." The woman said with disdain, shifting the baby in her arms, as if the girls would race up and snatch it away from her.

Even though they said nothing in reply to this woman, a younger man came bounding up to her while keeping a stern eye on them.

"Is everything alright, m'am? Are these girls troubling you?" He asked in concern, yet kept a grim watch.

Magenta scoffs loudly and Columbia keeps silent.

"Yes, they're walking around here, putting their _abomination_ of a relationship on display for the whole market to see! I've got children-there are children here!"

With the woman talking so loudly, a small crowd is starting to form. Magenta still refuses to let go of Columbia's hand, albeit the groupie starts to loosen her usually tight grip.

"How disgusting."

"They're going against the Lord!"

"Richard, take the kids back to the car, they shouldn't see this."

"Women shall not lie with women!"

And on and on the crowd goes. Just like that, things have escalated, and someone's pointing at Columbia, shouting something about a girl who used to go to church with her sweet parents. It takes a moment for Magenta to register that that person has recognized Columbia as Laura, the girl who went to church, and studied dance, and attended school here in good ole' Denton, USA. It's uncanny to think of Columbia like any other normal human; she's molded herself to fit in with the Transylvanian's back at the castle. Magenta can't picture her any other way. She thanks the stars, because it could've easily been Columbia among the crowd, spitting insults at her along with everyone else. The thought of that is what pushes her past her breaking point. Columbia has already let a few tears spill over, and now it's Magenta's turn.

Before more shit can hit the fan, Magenta begins to run, yanking Columbia along with her, the cart half filled with groceries forgotten in their dust. People actually cheer as they leave the store. Fucking _cheer_. Magenta pictures herself shooting every single one of them with the anti matter gun. It's not enough to stop the sobs that escape her while they reach the truck and hastily hop in.

Columbia is full on crying now, gasps and hiccups and everything. She waits to feel soft arms enclose around her, but it never happens. She glances back at Magenta, who hasn't even started the truck yet. She has both of her hands on the wheel and her forehead resting on it, too. The groupie doesn't even realize she's weeping until she sees Magenta shaking and her hands turning even whiter than they already are from gripping the steering wheel to tight.

She's whimpering and blubbering and _Jesus Christ_ , Columbia's never seen her like this. Sure, Magenta has cried actual tears before, but never in this capacity. Never sobbing. Despite this being the most basic human action in the world, Columbia can't help but think about this being the most _alien_ thing Magenta's ever done in front of her. The irony of it settles uneasily, and Columbia can not go on watching this any longer, because she will end up throwing herself in the middle of a busy highway just to keep from witnessing Magenta feel so broken. Columbia wants nothing more than to make the world right again for her girlfriend. She will do absolutely anything.

It doesn't seem much, when she scoots closer to the redhead, hesitant to touch her but still does. Her arms loop around her, and Magenta easily buries her head in the crook of the girls neck. Sobs are still wracking her petite body, and she desperately clings onto the groupie with much effort.

It's surreal how comfortably they can slip into each other's roles; Magenta into the part of Columbia as the bawling mess, and Columbia into the part of Magenta as the compassionate support system. It's foreign, yet feels just as right.

Magenta keeps whispering that she's sorry, but Columbia doesn't want to hear that, so she shushes her and rubs her back. Silence is too much, so she starts to hum as well. The humming is soothing to the domestic, and it helps.

They remain parked in the truck for what seems like hours. There will be no groceries for a little while.

...

 _Earth, Summer 1975._

It's finally happened!

Frank has found it!

Frank has found _him!_

The transvestite sings and struts up and down the pink laboratory because he has found the one. The body they will be experimenting; restoring back its life.

"Now, he won't go back to his previous way of life-he won't even know what he is," Frank says, "but we'll train him. He'll become one of us. Oh! Won't it be nice!"

His servants look on with much amusement, clearly filled with relief that Frank's finally found the host, and they can stop their stupid charade back at the church.

But, not a moment too soon, Frank turns to them, his face growing serious.

"And this doesn't mean we're all through and finished with the church."

He continues to sing and dance around, leaving the others to once again sigh and roll their eyes sharply. Frank keeps gravitating towards the tank, where the body is resting in.

This...body was a last minute addition when the parents came into the church with handkerchiefs practically glued to their leaking eyes. Frank was feeling particularly content that day, so he allowed for the funeral to be arranged rather quickly. The moment he laid eyes on the body, it was all over for the scientist. He quite fell in love. Thus, this man being their willing participant-who literally has no choice nor say in the matter because he's dead.

There's only one thing about him that doesn't tickle Frank in the right way.

"His _name_ is absurd." Frank announces this with a disgusted pout.

"What did you expect for an earthling, master? Nothing impressive, I presume."

"Yes, but... _Patrick_? Yuck! We shall change it at once!"

It takes a while-and few suggestions-but once Riff Raff mumbles a complaint, Frank snaps his fingers and demands the blonde to repeat himself. Of course, Riff is hesitant at first.

"I knew this mission to be rocky from the start..." He says cautiously.

Frank's face lights up as he actually squeals in excitement. It baffles the other three.

"Rocky! That's it! _Rocky!_ "

The transvestite jumps up and down playfully and goes to hug the handyman who is shocked beyond belief. His sister and Columbia watches on in amazement, then break out into a fit of laughter.

So Rocky it is, and no one argues with that idea.

Frank settles down and begins to explain the process that'll take place in the next couple of months.

Firstly, Frank and Riff Raff will diligently work on Rocky. Magenta and Columbia must keep out of the way. No problem there.

Secondly, they will continue to handle the church and everything else. Just this time, there will be no need to look for a body. Frank has taken a liken to this pass time, and has gotten himself a shitload of mates in result of it. He won't be missing that up. Figures.

Lastly, they will need to invite local Transylvanian's to the castle, so they can unveil the creation once he is ready to go. Frank is calling it a convention, and the others go along with it. It's a calm conversation, until the scientist mentions one thing to make the domestic light up like a fire cracker.

 _Time Warp_.

"Oh, the _Time Warp!_ The absolutely, positively best thing to happen in all existence!"

Magenta starts to sway happily in her spot next to Rocky's tank, laughing and humming a melody that sounds foreign to the groupie. She still watches on in awe. She loves it whenever Magenta gets this excited. Very few things get her this excited, so Columbia must know more.

"What's... _Time Warp_?"

Magenta freezes in her place, and slowly eyes her girlfriend. Columbia would guess she had said something completely wrong. But the redhead smiles wickedly, and all of her worries wash away.

"Oh, I'm _so_ teaching you! Come with me!"

Magenta tugs on Columbia's hand and leads her to the lift. Riff Raff waves goodbye with a knowing smile, slightly feeling bad for the groupie. They'll be doing the Time Warp all night. Frank rolls his eyes and continues to admire Rocky's well built form.

"So beautiful..."

"Why, thank you, master."

Frank whips his head to Riff Raff and gives him an annoyed stare. The handyman chuckles and gets back to work.

Meanwhile, Magenta is shoving Columbia into the ballroom, where the jukebox they dug up a while ago from the cellar, sits silently.

"It should be here...and yes!"

Magenta pushes a few buttons and it takes a moment, but then music starts to blare out of the machine. A sort of guitar riff strums, and Magenta is already singing along to this beat. Something about time is fleeting, and madness taking its toll. Columbia is at a lost, but it doesn't stop her from relishing in the moment. The music speeds up as more instruments are added to the mix, and Magenta reaches-what Columbia guesses-the chorus.

" _Let's do the Time Warp again! Let's do the Time Warp again!_ "

Columbia attempts to join in, but somewhat fails to do so. She ends up just observing Magenta.

" _It's just a jump to the left!_

 _And then a step to righ-igh-ight!_

 _Put your hands on your hips, and bring your knees in tigh-igh-ight!_

 _But it's the pelvic thrust, that really drives you insa-a-a-ane!_

 _Let's do the Time Warp again!_ "

The whole time, Magenta demonstrated each step with ease and happiness. It's as if the domestic is in a blissful trance and didn't mind it at all. Columbia's face began to hurt from smiling so much, which is no shocker because Columbia smiles way too much all the time anyway.

"Do it with me!" Magenta exclaims while pulling Columbia with her into the middle of the dance floor.

The girls laugh and dance for the rest of the evening. Columbia even added her own little tapping solo in the middle of the song, with the help and encouragement of the older woman. Afterwards, they lay limply next to each other on the floor, gazing up at the ceiling.

"Transsexual sounds like a hip place."

Magenta smiles softly at the groupies observation.

"It is. You would love it there."

"Would I?"

"Oh, yes."

It's silent for a few moments.

"Magenta?"

"Hmm?"

"When this...mission...is over," The hesitance in Columbia's voice is as clear as day. "Will you guys be going back to Transsexual?"

It was hesitance mixed with a somber tone, and the domestic's face fell at the sound of it.

"Yes. We have too." Her voice is small; so small the groupie could've easily missed the response. But she didn't.

"Oh."

"But," Magenta began, discreetly sliding her hand across the floor to where Columbia rested hers by her side. "You'll be coming with us, wouldn't you?"

Magenta wanted to sound more confident and not so tense. Instead she sounded so tense, that she might as well had desperately grabbed onto Columbia and tearfully begged her to go with them back to her home planet.

The intense relief that washed over Columbia was an indescribable feeling for the groupie. She almost wept at that exact moment. She doesn't weep, but she does roll over onto her side so she faces Magenta. Her toothy grin gives the domestic just the answer she was looking for.

"Of course, I'll go!"

Magenta squeals, and rolls over as well. She practically pounces on the taller girl and they both laugh breathlessly.

"Oh, I'm so glad!"

"Yeah, earth here isn't going so well for me. I never thought I actually fit in, ya know?"

They both sit up against the jukebox. Columbia tucks her long legs up to her chest, where she rests her head on her knees. Magenta let's her legs sprawl out in front of her, crossing them at the ankles.

"I see what you mean. Earth isn't so...accepting."

Columbia nods dolefully, instinctively reaching for the others hand.

"Sometimes-more recently-I like to imagine being from Transsexual. Maybe...we can pretend that I am? If that's okay with you..."

Magenta beams.

"Absolutely."

...

 _Earth, Fall 1975._

Magenta wakes up in Columbia's arms.

Instant happiness floods into her, something that's been occurring more and more over the past few months. Everything tells her it all has to do with the younger groupie, with her thin arms still loosely wrapped around her bare skin. Everything is right.

The sun's pouring in through the windows, bathing the room in an attractive twinkling glow. It's very pretty, but Magenta thinks Columbia's face is prettier, so she stares at that for a while longer, until the sleeping girl starts to stir awake. Their eyes meet, and with that, the day has officially begun.

According to Frank, tonight will be the birth of Rocky.

First, the church must be taken care of, since a wedding is scheduled for today. Then, they must prepare for the arrival of the Transylvanian's. Heavy planning for the past several weeks have all led up to this event, and nothing will spoil it. Absolutely nothing at all. Not even Eddie's body being dumped into the freezer after forcibly using half of his brain to donate it to the creation. Columbia and the siblings were at first furiously against the idea, but Frank gave them no other choice. After all, Frank grew bored of him as well. And taking advantage of the pizza boy was taken directly to spite his wheelchair-bound uncle, who wasn't shy in regarding his suspicious manner. The German Doctor _was_ curious to investigate where Eddie would run off too now and again (too curious, in Franks opinion). It was no longer a negotiable matter, so that was that.

Magenta was the first to haul herself out of bed, much to her girlfriends protest that they should remain in bed all morning because the boys won't miss them, and they certainly won't miss the boys. The domestic can only snicker at the line, and continued to drape a silk robe over her nude form. Columbia was definitely disappointed with the cover up, and showed it shamelessly.

"Boo, take off your clothes." The groupie said in a mock manly voice, seemingly mimicking an older rowdy gentleman gawking at a stripper or something.

Magenta laughs at that while tossing a seductive wink, and shuffles around the room for her uniform. She finds it in a crumpled mess on the floor by the door, her cheeks burning over the sudden memories of the previous night overtaking her mind; clothes being strewn everywhere the second they stumbled through the door.

A sparkling corset that sits near the maids outfit catches her attention and Magenta picks it up. She turns around to show it off for Columbia.

"You should wear this today-you'd look so cute."

Columbia eyes the corset, her tongue poking out of her mouth in thought. Finally she shrugs.

"Sure. It is cute, and I _would_ look cute in it."

Columbia sits up and let's the comforter pool around her waist, exposing her bare chest. Magenta doesn't even try to look away.

"You perv," Columbia smirks at catching the lustful stare, "I'll have to wear it later though, at the party, because church. Ya know."

Magenta nods and stores the fitted garment away for later.

The girls end up showering together and meeting the boys for breakfast, all dressed in their earthling disguises. The actual wedding doesn't start for another couple of hours, but they leave for the church anyways.

Columbia's sitting on the steps of the building, fumbling with her wig, when she feels a pair of lips start to pepper itself all over the back of her neck.

"Mm, yes, Mrs. Wood?" Columbia said the domestic's alias in a playful, yet sensual tone.

She could feel Magenta's lips curve into a smile while she kept them planted on the base of the groupies head.

"I'm no longer Mrs. Wood," she whispered in a teasing husky voice, "I've left my husband, and now I have my eyes trained on a certain spinster. Think you can help me woo her?"

Columbia giggles and twists her body to face her lover. They share a soft kiss that doesn't last long because it soon grows heated; their quiet moans seeping through their throats. That doesn't last long either since Frank is literally _everywhere_.

He clears his throat rudely, and the girls separate from their intimate embrace. They both turn to see him standing in the doorway, clad in his usual minister attire, his hands clasped behind his back, and his expression hard.

"Now, _really_ , girls," his voice seems exasperated, but he tried hard not to let it show too much. He _is_ annoyed by their constant public displays of affection; he just doesn't want them thinking that they have this sort of affect or hold on him. It's clearly a power play, and he won't see it any other way. "Stop this public indecency and help us with the décor. It has to _look_ like we're professional enough to give a wedding, you do know."

Public indecency? Magenta and Columbia look to each other the minute Frank briskly turned back into the church, and almost lost it in hysterics.

"Frankie's got some nerve telling _us_ not to indecent the public!"

Magenta laughs at Columbia's choice of diction, thanking the stars that they'd align just perfectly enough so that these two polar opposites would cross paths. It's a complicated way of saying how grateful Magenta is to have found this girl. So grateful, that she has to kiss her again. It only seems appropriate, right?

They slowly pull apart before Frank can storm back out and properly scold them.

The wedding is...nice this time around. Not so much a hassle-granted, they've been doing this a while now, so less room for error.

The bride enthusiastically leaves with a new name and a handsome groom on her arm. Ralph and Betty Hapschat seem destined to be together. It showed during the ceremony, and Columbia might've mentioned it to the domestic during the most trivial parts that still came across as romantic to the groupie. It's a smiling day for Magenta, she guesses.

Albeit the wedding has ceased, and most of the guests were all gone (pathetically running after a moving vehicle as if they all wanted to jump onto it and ride with it into the sunset), two young looking earthlings decided to linger a while longer. Magenta is rather annoyed with this, _especially_ when singing became involved. But, they all joined in anyways, for the sake of smoothly and (sorta) discreetly ushering these people out of here as quickly as they can without seeming to rude.

Eventually, the two newly engaged love birds depart from the church, too. Columbia drones on and on about how lovely it was to witness that, despite her expression saying otherwise. All Magenta could do was loop her arm around the taller girls waist, and lean into her side, trying to gather some warmth on this very chilly day. They all make it back to the castle and begin to prepare for the following nights affair.

Magenta fishes for the glittery corset from a drawer, intent on seeing it adorn the taller girls lithe frame.

"Oh, yes," she coos, lifting it up for the two to see, "I'm going to enjoy eyeing you in this."

Columbia shakes her head amusingly at the older woman, picking up a pair of striped shorts from the floor to inspect for cleanliness.

"My costumes complete. What're you gonna wear?"

"My usual uniform." Magenta responds without looking at the groupie, opting instead to begin tidying up around the room. Though she may be a lousy domestic, she still has the decency to make sure their room isn't buried to the brim with clutter.

Columbia purses her lips in slight disappointment, but isn't really surprised. Magenta doesn't miss the minor sorrow that ghosts over her girlfriends features. The redhead smirks at the action, prompting her to enclose her in a halfway hug.

"Don't fret, Collie," Columbia smiles brightly at the nickname, "you can always picture what I have underneath." Magenta's tone is so suggestive and sexual, that the taller girl couldn't help but crash her soft lips onto Magenta's own. It's a while before they regroup with the others in the foyer of the castle.

By nightfall, groups of Trannies began to appear. Riff Raff opened the door for them, greeting each and every Transylvanian that passed the threshold, scrutinizing the spacious castles atrium in wonder. Obviously, they've rarely visited hackneyed castle ships before. Magenta stands at the end of the hall, leading them towards the grand ballroom, where Columbia stands vibrantly, yet anxiously by the snack table (thrown in hastily at the last second).

When everyone's welcomed and settled, Magenta blows a doting kiss to Columbia, and slips out of the room to assist Riff Raff with the rain jackets all of the Trannies came in with.

"Thank you, sister," Riff says, "you're very kind to help me."

"No worries, Riff." She waves a delicate hand at him, turning just in time to hear Frank howling from stars know where.

"Magenta! I hope you've dusted! Are they here yet?!"

The domestic glances at her brother and makes a show of rolling her eyes dramatically. She informs him that they have arrived, and are mingling in the ballroom. The transvestite calls out a thanks, and is never heard afterwards. Magenta barely has to wander a bit before she spots the feather duster on top of a mantle near the entrance. She grabs it and lazily runs it over any to all surfaces. She makes it halfway up the railing when the doorbell suddenly rings. Oh. Have they more Trannies to welcome?

She watches Riff Raff saunter over to the door, interested in the matter since she sworn everyone had made it and are currently in the ballroom at that very moment. So, who's there?

"Hi! I'm Brad Majors...and this is my fiancé, Janet Weiss."

Magenta has to fight the urge to groan out loud-otherwise, they would hear it, despite heavy rain pounding on the pavements just outside the door. She _doesn't_ fight the urge to make a grand debut, and finally finds the perfect excuse to slide down the wooden banister. It startles the earthlings, like she hoped, and that's apparently Riff's cue to start singing because suddenly someone has commenced the Time Warp. Magenta has zero qualms with the matter. She joins her brother effortlessly, and falls in love with the stunned appearances by their uninvited guests. Why are earthlings so clueless about fun?

Everything's a dream, practically. Columbia has just debuted her stellar performance, albeit falling short and miscalculating on the amount of floor there was available for her before colliding with the steps. Magenta can't help but giggle softly at the mishap, the groupie shooting her a glare because of it.

Frank appears soon after, a cape wrapped around his barely covered flesh, and struts down the makeshift narrow hall of bodies that electrified with excitement and anticipation. The servants were less pleased, but observing the gawking faces of the earthlings truly made up for it. Magenta is positively _living_ for this moment; committing all of this to memory. Although they may be boring, fowling creatures, earthlings can be entertaining to tease.

Stripping them of their articles of clothing was a sight to behold just as well. This Brad man is _very_ tall, and fairly decent to look at, really. The Janet should feel so lucky. The same could be said for Brad, because stars, Janet is just as attractive. Now, if only she'd stop fainting and screaming. A nice slapping would do her good, but Columbia gives her a warning glance and Magenta retracts her hand from lingering by the innocent girls face, waiting and itching to be struck. Up the lift they all go, and they meet Frank and the others in the pink laboratory. It's obvious how anxious these humans seem, and it is comical for the domestic to see because she remembers how Columbia first took in the sight of this room; all awe and wonder, like a child in a museum for candy or something (Magenta doesn't really know what museums should be all about, but if it were up to her, she'd want them to have lots and lots of chocolate in them). Columbia easily slips into that distant memory also, her heart warming over the thought of how much she's changed, and how much she likes the change. Before she can tangle her fingers with the redhead, Frank addresses them by their names, and they once again have to snap back into their authentic servant modes.

"Go and assist Riff Raff," he commands.

They follow orders and meet the handyman behind the tank, wondering what on earth he would need them for. Just Frank's way of getting them out of sight so he could properly introduce the engaged couple. Typical.

It's an exciting process; for Columbia, really. She's never seen anything like this before. To the siblings, this is all mundane and tiresome, since they've seen these kinds of things played out in the past. Not with an earthling on earth, but somewhat similar to that of events and experiments on Transsexual. Magenta half smiles anyways and just enjoys the look of amazement on her girlfriends face. _I'd do anything for that look_ , she thinks for the millionth time.

He awakens. The rooms bursts with applause and Frank is so damn smitten at the moment, it irks the three. But, must keep the master happy at all times, right?

He becomes furious with Columbia because of something she said for some entitled reason and Magenta watches the transvestite with pure hatred and vengeance. She manages to snag her brother later when everyone vacates the lab, and discuss in hopes of accumulating a scheme to subdue the doctor. It's only fair now, since they've completed their stupid mission and can actually go back home. Columbia returns after showing the earthlings to their separate rooms and is included in on the formulating plan.

After engaging in hushed tones (you can never be too careful around here), Columbia disappears into the lift, and carries herself back to her shared bedroom. Magenta stays behind and begrudgingly begins to swipe a wet mop over the tiled floors, ignoring her inner screams of protest to dispose of the earth appliance and run after her taller lover. Riff can see the mental battle raging on in his sister, so he glances at the creation resting alone in the love bed where Frank has left him, a sinister smile growing on his lips. He glides over to Magenta, and wordlessly beckons for her attention. She looks at him with curious eyes, following his line of view. She immediately catches on and allows a sly smirk to form.

Later, Columbia grins at the sight of her red headed partner shutting the bedroom door softly behind her. Her hair's damp and matted to the sides of her face, indicating that she's just gotten out of the shower. The groupie pauses to let her eyes wash over the domestic's body, taking note of her outfit change. Out with the uniform; now a black see through negligee, with pink fluffs laced onto the ends of the sleeves, adorned her petite frame. If it was meant to cover her black underwear, it was doing a very poor job. A low whistle escapes the pink haired girl as she tugs on the collar of her pajama top, and suddenly it's a little too warm in here. Magenta walks-or _struts_ seductively-over, relishing in the look of adoration and lust on the younger girls shining face. The magazine, suddenly forgotten, falls out of the groupies hands and lands on the floor. Neither woman moves to retrieve it. It continues to lie there even after all of the panting and moaning has ceased to persist.

Not very long after, they become lost in their heated passion _again_ after shamelessly watching the Janet enjoy herself with the doctor's creation from the surveillance-slash-television monitor.

Magenta reluctantly detangles herself from their misty limbs, mumbling a curse under her breath.

"Where ya going?" Columbia whines, reaching blindly for the domestic's hand or leg or _anything_.

The shorter girl looks back with a gloomy expression, already regretting leaving her girlfriend behind. But, she must attend to her duties.

 _Fuck these duties._

"Sorry, Collie," she murmurs, "I have to prepare dinner."

"Oh," it's a defeated tone she uses. Magenta can't help but want to hug Columbia forever so that she would never have to use that tone again.

"I'll return shortly when it's ready, yeah?"

"Okay."

She leaves. Columbia remembers to wonder about the strange man in a wheelchair who had circled them once and left a little while ago. She shrugs her slender shoulders and resumes reading her magazine that she's already read hundreds of times before.

It's not too long before Magenta makes do on her promise, and soon Columbia finds herself sitting amongst the others at the fancy dinner table.

The siblings burst into the still room, trudging a cart along the way to the head of the table, where Frank sat looking extra pleased with himself-if that were even possible. Columbia notices Magenta now adoring the black chiffon she _oh so loved_ to watch her in. The groupie squirms in her seat, flustered at the sight of her girlfriend standing so close to her in that risqué wardrobe. Magenta notices and smiles smugly. Things escalate, as per usual, and somehow Frank is slapping Janet while she continues to shriek all around the castle. Things boil over once everyone meets back in the pink laboratory, and by this point, Frank is a little more than fed up.

Hot dogs are being sung and Magenta is just really liking this jubilating task of medusa-ing these silly earthlings; that is, until Columbia becomes fed up herself. In true Frank N. Furter fashion, if _he's_ in a pissed off mood, then no one else can be, too because then that takes all of the attention and power away from him. At least, that's how he concludes it. But right now, no one's more pissed off than Magenta, because the transvestite has _literally_ shoved the domestic out of the way and medusa'd the groupie himself.

It amazes Magenta just how _strong_ her brother is at the moment, keeping her locked in his thin arms with an iron grip, refusing to let her go and completely _destroy_ their master.

" _You fucking piece of shit! I will kill you!_ "

Magenta is seething. Frank couldn't care less.

"Now, Magenta, really?" The doctor crosses his arms over his chest and smirks in spite of the redhead raging before him. "You know she's fine. You also know I need her for my grand performance! Stop blowing this all out of proportion,"

He strolls back over to the lift, pausing before closing the hatch.

"Come, we're ready for the floor show."

With that, he disappears. Magenta moves to de-medusa her girlfriend when Riff stops her.

"What the fuck are you doing?" She growls at her brother.

"We have to go along with this, sister. Remember the plan."

"Yeah, that was BEFORE he turned her to stone, Riff."

"She's okay-you know that."

"But..." She trails off and looks to the groupie, her fists balled up and perched on her hips, seemingly annoyed with the world and life itself. Magenta groans, despising this situation more and more. She sighs before turning back towards the handyman.

"This plan better succeed." Magenta mutters darkly, grabbing her brothers arm and leading them back up the ramp and to the man made hole.

The plan starts off working well, for the most part. They burst in at the perfect moment, catching everyone, but one, completely off guard; especially Frank. Magenta is _living_ for this.

The plan is simple: capture Frank N. Furter. Let the earthlings go. Proceed back to Transsexual. Turn him over to the court. Celebrate!

They barely make it past the first step, because Frank insists on explaining himself, which raises alarming concern for the siblings since he's singing about _wanting to go home_ or _realizing this is his home_ or _something_ -either way, it's angering Riff Raff and he's now got his eyes set on their master, dangerously thrusting the antimatter gun in his direction. Magenta is internally screaming for him to just shoot Frank.

 _Shoot, shoot, shoot!_

She narrows her eyes at him, while he twitches his lips, and he's grasping onto the gun with both hands, _so_ ready to pull that trigger, and there's an actual scream being belted out of seemingly nowhere, and it startles him so that he actually ends up turning around as he's pressing his finger against the switch, and _no no no no no, that did not just happen_ -

The plan is suddenly tossed in an entirely different direction than before. It's evident in the way Magenta has abandoned her previous stoic demeanor and is now on the floor clinging to a still body, choking on her sobs, forgetting the rest of the world for now. Riff Raff goes ahead and shoots the transvestite instantly after recovering from his sudden shock. He kills the creation too, and demands the earthlings to vacate immediately. The two heroines and the German scientist look on helplessly and sympathetically as they pass Magenta in a crumpled mess over Columbia's form. Janet almost wants to stop and comfort the domestic, but Riff Raff is hurriedly ushering them out of the room, threatening them with the gun. They no longer need to be told twice.

The handyman sighs audibly, turning his sorrow gaze onto the devastating scene; his sister hunched over and cradling her lover in her arms, caressing the younger girls cheek softy, whispering in her ear. The overwhelming feeling of guilt and dread washes over Riff, leaving him speechless and motionless, completely _useless_.

He doesn't know what to do or even say. It breaks his heart. In that moment, Riff Raff wants nothing more than to rewind time and keep himself from shooting Columbia. He wants to tell (scream) Magenta that is was an accident, a _stupid, deadly, fucking accident,_ but he doesn't know how. He can't talk, anyways.

Instead, he slowly makes his way over to Magenta, and cautiously places a gentle hand on her shaking shoulder. She either doesn't feel his touch, or doesn't care about it. Either way, she remains weeping and clutching the girl tightly, reluctant to let her go.

For a moment, Riff wants to turn the gun onto himself.

He doesn't.

He patiently rubs a soothing hand up and down his sister's spine, and manages to lead Magenta back to his room after (what feels like) hours of grieving over the groupie's body. He settles her in his room because bringing her to _their_ room would only upset the fragile woman further. _Stars knows_ he refuses to let that happen.

She lies so still that she may have just died herself, he thinks. But the occasional sob that escapes her gives him the reassurance that she is indeed alive, even though she clearly doesn't want to be.

Magenta is _dead_ -in an emotional sense.

All hope has been completely stripped away and all feelings have become completely toxic; only a void is left. She wants Riff Raff to leave her alone (and maybe _die_ ), but she doesn't have the energy to tell him to fuck off. Eventually he gets the hint anyway and steps out of the room without her saying so, leaving Magenta to feel a little bit guilty about wanting her own brother dead. But, she can't help it. She can't help _her_ , and like that, she's reduced to an onset of fresh tears freely spilling down her heated cheeks once again.

She can recall precious times and memories where Columbia can be seen adorably fumbling with an item, her tongue poking out of her mouth, deep in thought. Moments where the groupie has never caught the domestic just staring at her in admiration, in complete gratefulness and pleasure. Just watching the younger girl float around in this meaningless world, trying her best and hoping for more and sprouting and growing and changing and _living_ and-

 _It wasn't suppose to turn out this way. You weren't suppose to leave me. We should've been on our way to Transsexual by now._

The thoughts repeat over and over, permanently etching itself into the core of her mind, making no more room for other things to fuss or worry about. For the next few days, she lives and breathes those words. She thinks of nothing else, she cares of nothing else, she she feels of nothing else.

Meanwhile, the castle has remained in its exact spot in the secluded forest. Riff Raff came fairly close to just launching them back into space anyways, but he needed his sister to be okay. He needed to her to snap out of this mindless daze and to join him in the control room. He needed to... _fucking do something._

"Why am I an imbecile?" He mutters harshly to himself, bolting out of the control room that he's spent sulking around for the last couple of days while his sister kept herself locked away in his room, only leaving to use the bathroom.

Columbia laid limp on the floor where they had left her, still wearing her Floor Show costume, her face painted with running makeup. She almost looked at peace.

Almost.

When he bent over to lay a hand on her forearm, he immediately recoiled at the icy coldness of the touch. Ignoring it when he closes in for a second contact, he manages to lift her up bridal style and carry her out of the auditorium.

It's another few days before he turns up in front of his bedroom door again, ready to rasp his knuckles over the wood. Usually, on the days prior, he'd knock a few times before leaving a fresh plate of food for his sister. It took a while for him to actually find the plates right where he'd leave it, cleared of any food, and the door still shut tight.

 _Good. She should be eating,_ he thinks, still so heavily concerned for Magenta's well being. Well, of course he is-she's family. She's the only thing in the galaxy, in his _entire life_ , that he gives a second thought to; that he would die for, live for, _be_ for.

But now, he isn't interested in leaving her a plate; he's interested (and fucking _determined_ , damn it) in coaxing her out of the room, and taking her to the pink laboratory. He doesn't want to waste anymore time because anything can happen and all of his hard, albeit rushed, work would be for nothing.

He knocks rapidly and doesn't wait for an answer he knows won't come. Magenta is...at least sitting up, and doing something productive; even if it is just simply gazing out of the window and at the stars, most likely. Magenta is still in her Transsexual uniform, but her hair has long since deflated back into its original wild mane-like state. She never turns to glance at him. She knows who it is, but doesn't really care. She still feels somewhat awful about that, but it's the furthest thing on her mind. She tries-and fails-to shoo him away using the powers of telepathy, so she opts for kneeling silently by the open window and pretending to pay attention to the twinkling stars in the navy colored sky. She can feel him standing in the middle of his room; probably hesitating whether or not to disturb his dear younger sister. Magenta rolls her eyes, out of sight from her brothers penetrating stares.

"Magenta," he says softly. The domestic doesn't immediately acknowledge his voice, but she noticeably tenses.

"I need you to come with me."

The woman doesn't move. She remains still. Her shoulders moving up and down in result of her breathing is the only thing in motion about her. Her eyes flicker across the night, wishing and dreaming that she were up there-not _here_ -and just existing _somewhere else_. She wanted and longed for Transsexual. But it still hurts to even move.

She remains still.

Riff Raff decides that he will move her anyhow.

Magenta cries weakly for him to put her down, but the attempts are pathetic, so it breaks the handyman's heart to see his strong, passionate sister in this state of being. He doesn't let her down until they make it to the lift. The redhead is so detached and broken, that she can barely stand up right; she instead allows her body to slowly collapse onto the floor of the lift, her face buried in her hands and her shoulders wracking with heavy sobs. She has no idea why Riff would do this to her, no idea why he would disturb her and bring her to the last place she'd like to be at the moment, no idea why she hasn't just ripped his face off yet. A sickening feeling washes over her following after the last thought, and to relieve the guilt, she doesn't protest or resist when Riff gently guides her off of the floor and out of the lift. She hadn't even realized they had made it to the top floor.

The pink laboratory was always Magenta's least favorite place in the castle. If she could avoid the room at all costs, she would. Columbia rather enjoyed the peculiar lair; but that stems from her normal curiosity and naive nature. She'd never seen a room like this before. Magenta bets that it had a lot to do with the paint job. She always meant to ask the master if she could repaint the tiles into something more...dark. Black, perhaps. The woman almost laughs at the memory of actually _wanting_ to do something so domestic-ly. At the moment, she'd repaint the room, but using a lighter shade of pink. For Columbia.

A sheet of white catches Magenta's eyes. She snaps her head in the direction of Rocky's tank. In the tank, was a flat table surface, and on the table laid something; something with a white sheet completely covering it. Her heart stops. Goosebumps dance across her skin, and her mouth involuntarily dries. Silence easily engulfs the room, only being shattered by the slight gasp that the domestic evicts. Riff Raff wastes no more time, and leads Magenta toward the tank. Step after step; everything's going incredibly slow for her. It's as if she's learning how to walk again, how to _live_ again.

"Riff Raff..." Is the only other sound that follows her earlier gasp. It's low and uncertain; it's curious and hopeful; it's _terrified_.

The handyman doesn't say a word. He carefully pulls the sheet down.

Columbia lays unmoving on her back. Her eyes are closed.

But Magenta can see the flickering behind her eye lids. She can see her lips twitching, and her chest rising and falling.

And like Riff Raff, she doesn't waste anymore time.

"Columbia," she lets out a mangled sob, and reaches an unsteady hand towards the younger girl.

Her eyes open, and suddenly a sea of shining green blinds the redhead.

...

 _Transsexual, 12th Moon Rotation._

 _(Earth, Winter 1975.)_

Magenta was right.

The shores of Transsexual is truly a sight to behold.

Columbia sits cross legged on the silver colored sand. Magenta rests her head in the taller girls lap, her legs sprawled out in front of them, crossed at the ankles. They both gaze at the various moons that decorate the night sky. Some are close, so they appear larger, while others are farther away and appear a lot smaller. Columbia decides to give them all names. Magenta decides that might be the latest cutest thing Columbia has done since landing on Transsexual with the siblings. She also decides that she should keep a list-something to tease the groupie with later on.

The silence is comfortable. Only the sounds of waves of water kissing the shores of this land can be heard. Some music can be heard in the distance. An airlift car rushes by. Columbia's soft breathing. A content sigh from Magenta.

"Wonder what the old Columbia would think of _this_ ," the pink haired girl says, an amused smile playing on her lips, though the former domestic can't see from her position on the younger girls lap.

Magenta chuckles a bit before replying.

"She'd probably think, 'Me? In space? That's the silliest thing I've ever heard! Now where are my tap shoes...'"

The girls share a laugh, while Columbia playfully swats the shorter woman on her arm.

The laughing subsides and Columbia exhales a breath.

"Nah, she'd probably think, 'Me? With a pretty girl? Sign me up!'"

"Old Columbia thinks I'm pretty?" Magenta muses, tilting her head up to catch the eyes of the groupie.

"Oh, yes," Columbia casts a lustful look toward her, " _beautiful_ , even,"

"You know what the old Magenta would think?"

"What?"

"She'd think, 'No one could take my pretty flower away.'-'Flower' meaning you,"

"Aw, and why can't anyone take her away? What'd old Magenta think about that?"

"She'd think, 'Because _she keeps me warm_.'"

Magenta and Columbia remain in their positions, just staring into each other's green orbs.

The last thing Magenta thinks about before closing the gap between the two is how right she was to acknowledge just how _interesting_ earth is. She mentally makes plans to visit the strange planet again.

...

 **A/N** : Oh my stars! Am I finished yet?! YES.

Thanks to all who've read up until the end! This was absolute trash and also my new favorite piece of work! Woohoo!

I apologize for making this so long-I intended maybe around 6,000 words, but of course that's way off the target. But, it's 6,000+ words of complete Columbia and Magenta, so there you go! I won't be continuing this, so don't even ask. Draw your own conclusions.

I had a lot of fun writing this, and I hope you had a lot of fun reading it. Please, leave a review! It helps me out a bunch!

Thanks again for reading, and have a kick ass day ;)


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